Friday, December 28, 2012

A Kiss at Midnight

I hope you all had lovely Christmases. Mine was awesome! Relaxing to the max.

This post is not about Christmas though, it is about New Years! Well… not New Year’s really, but the kissing thing that goes along with it.

Personally, I would rather have someone to kiss at noon on New Year’s Day than a one-time kiss at midnight. I also know that for many folks out there this option is not reality.


New Year’s Eve is a time to celebrate the passing of one year and the welcoming of a new. Why then is a kiss part of the equation? Is it because we are ceremonially kissing the previous year goodbye? Or is it because we are kissing the one who we want to begin the New Year with? It is a fact that 85% of NYE dates are not planning on ending that same year together (Psych, I made that statistic up, but it is probably close!). So why the pressure? Why the stock on having someone to kiss? Doesn't the desperation involved slightly make it lose its meaning? I would say so.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the NYE glitter, champy and fun. But over the years I have probably only had one or two NYE nights that got close to the hype surrounding them. And one of them was probably the millennium. The fact that Y2K didn't happen should keep NYE ‘99 at the top of all of our lists. Also, do you remember Will Smith’s album Willenium? Yeah, Will 2 K forevs.

So do not feel bad if you don’t have a midnight kiss lined up. I’m sure there will be a stranger waiting in the wings. And who knows, maybe they are your soul mate!? But think twice and ask about their bill of health before you go snogging a possibly herpes ridden stranger. That meaningless midnight smooch might leave you with more than a hangover the next day… It might leave you wondering if you should hit up the free clinic.

Or consider having a NYE change of perspective as I have. Because wouldn't you rather have someone to kiss at noon on New Year’s Day and the days following? I know I would.

Happy almost 2013!

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Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from 1989! If only we were still this cute.

It is Christmas, therefore I will not be putting effort into a post. Duh. Instead, I thought I would share a Christmas card my mother sent out when we were children. Obviously pre "dark years" (middle school).


Enjoy some time with your loved ones! I know I will. Merry Christmas to you all!

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Text that GIF.

I have some new fun for you all! The day? Saturday. The activity? Texting GIFs. The result? non-stop hilarity via text. And the fun hasn't stopped since.

Trying to get Marina to come over after discussing her need to do laundry at my apt:

Mar’s text:

“This is what happens when I think about leaving my couch.”

My response to her attitude:


I received this text from Libby (mid movie) on Sunday night:

“How I feel when Laura makes us watch ABC Family Christmas movies.” 

Then there are some reaction GIFs that have been used in multiple scenarios. They work best in gossipy conversations. Hey, at least I'm honest!



I really recommend this form of communication. It makes everything more exciting!

PS. This is how Marina feels about you not wanting to use GIFs in your texts.

“Are you effing kidding me?”

Monday, December 17, 2012

Happy faces and heavy hearts.

Hello to you all. I have noticed the blog shift today as people decide not to post normally and instead talk about their heavy hearts, gun control and mental health services. I don't have a lot to say politically, nor do I have eloquent words about the happenings in our fallen world. So...

This poem was emailed to me and I'm sure it is viral on Facebook or something, but I don't really care. It gave me joy so I want to share it too!

Twas’ 11 days before Christmas, around 9:38
when 20 beautiful children stormed through heaven’s gate.
their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air.
they could hardly believe all the beauty they saw there.
they were filled with such joy, they didn't know what to say.
they remembered nothing of what had happened earlier that day.
“where are we?” asked a little girl, as quiet as a mouse.
“this is heaven.” declared a small boy. “we’re spending Christmas at God’s house.”
when what to their wondering eyes did appear,
but Jesus, their savior, the children gathered near.
He looked at them and smiled, and they smiled just the same.
then He opened His arms and He called them by name.
and in that moment was joy, that only heaven can bring
those children all flew into the arms of their King
and as they lingered in the warmth of His embrace,
one small girl turned and looked at Jesus’ face.
and as if He could read all the questions she had
He gently whispered to her, “I’ll take care of mom and dad.”
then He looked down on earth, the world far below
He saw all of the hurt, the sorrow, and woe
then He closed His eyes and He outstretched His hand,
“Let My power and presence re-enter this land!”
“may this country be delivered from the hands of fools”
“I’m taking back my nation. I’m taking back my schools!”
then He and the children stood up without a sound.
“come now my children, let me show you around.”
excitement filled the space, some skipped and some ran.
all displaying enthusiasm that only a small child can.
and i heard Him proclaim as He walked out of sight,
“in the midst of this darkness, I AM STILL THE LIGHT.”

- Cameo Smith

Have a lovely day my friends! Remember that just because evil is present does not mean that God is absent. When tragedy strikes our world like this, people begin to treat one another better. We are more tolerant, we smile each other more, we are less inclined to freak out at stupid drivers (sort of). We are somehow given perspective for a brief moment. Sadly, the perspective usually fades, but for now let's share our happy faces.

I will try and bring you a smile with an embarrassing story about myself later in the week. Be nice to each other!

Thursday, December 13, 2012

All I want for Christmas.

Is a new Christmas recipe to try and a perfect ski day.

Actually, what I really want is the means, clothing and motivation to dress cuter. But I think that is just a pipe dream at this point.

Okay, I admit it. You know I am still holding out for the Harry Potter Snuggie. I guess Santa didn't get my letter last year. Now they are sold out!! I guess I’ll have to go back on the Hogwarts Express without my cozy Griffindor robes. Lame. (Full disclosure, I am aware that I would probably be a Hufflepuff. So embarrassing.)


Cheesy, but the best gift is going to be spending awesome quality time with my family and friends. My family is super cool and hilarious (mostly on accident). I am excited for a lazy Christmas morning, a big breakfast and cooking all afternoon.  Another highlight will be spending the evening by the fire with a glass of mulled wine and a stockpile of Christmas cookies. These cookies will have been baked with my gurl Caitlin. We have been doing a Christmas cookie bake since high school. It is seriously awesome and you should be jealous!

Gross pictures. But these things will happen! 

Maybe I am alone here, but I haven’t really enjoyed the festivities that this holiday season has to offer. It has been too rainy to get hot cocoa and walk downtown looking at the lights! I haven’t been to Zoo Lights since I was a small child either… not that I’m tryna do that. It is probs a rip off. Basically I have only seen the tree in Pioneer Square doing a drive by and I have done most of my shopping online. It makes me feel like something is missing! The city goes all out and I feel like I have turned my back on the fun. Peacock Lane anyone? Let’s hold hands and look at the lights.

Not related really, but this is my parents Christmas card. Cute right!?


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Tuesday, December 11, 2012

The cry face of Claire Danes.

For many years the “Claire Danes cry” has been a running joke with my friends. I can just shout out a weird cry noise and they know exactly what scene of Romeo and Juliet I am referring to. This is of course followed by hysterical laughter.

Over the years, Claire Danes' cry has been all over my TV. She would cry over my main man/ not so secret 90s crush Jordan Catalano (MSCL). She would cry about having scarlet fever (LW). She would cry about her man drinking poison (R&J). It was just madness.


To my complete and joyful surprise! There is a twitter account for Claire Danes and her crazy cry face. @ClaireDanesChin exists and I find it absolutely hilarious! Thank you Homeland for bringing the cry face back into our lives. Merry Christmas to me!

I leave you with a Claire Danes crying supercut.


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Thursday, December 06, 2012

Help me! I'm scaly.

My moisturizer has been discontinued!!! Or at least they have stopped carrying it in all of my stores. I have used Johnson’s soft lotion (the pink one) for about 8 years… now it is gone. Last time I found it I stocked up, but it of course didn't last. I currently have a moisturizer that works fine but smells like “amber scent” my least favorite ever. I had no idea when I purchased. It was all sealed up. Damn you Target! BUT I feel like I should use it because I don’t want to waste!

This is me. 

I had some Kiehl’s dry oil that I was obsessed with all summer, but it ran out super-fast and isn't cheap… plus it smells a little bit like pot. Not my jam.

Here is what I am looking for:
A not super expensive dry oil or rich moisturizer that absorbs fast. It would ideally have a pump, but I guess I could DIY that bit. It must have a light fresh scent that isn't overwhelmingly manly, naturey or floral. Basically, I want it to smell good, but be light enough that it doesn't conflict with a perfume if I choose to wear one.

Any suggestions!? I am at a loss. The winter months are here and this will become an issue. Call me, email me, text me, or comment. I am desperate. This is kind of embarrassing considering the real problems in the world. Meh, just deal.

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Tuesday, December 04, 2012

Things I am not good at: Sports/ Being competitive

I am going to start a new series. All of the other series type things on this blog have obviously taken a lengthy hiatus… so don’t put a lot of hope into this one either. This series is going to be: Things I am not good at. I thought it could provide some general entertainment to the masses. I am good at a lot of stuff, but I am bad at just as much stuff! God does that to keep us on an equal playing field (I can back it up with some verses if you would like).  For a non-biblical example: Aren't people who are good at math usually bad at human interaction? Haha! I just say that because I’m bad a math. But that is a post for another time.

This post is about traditional sports and my lack of competitive nature.

I am coordinated at some things. I have good balance and flexibility and I am decently strong. Not like crazy strong. I don’t do cross-fit or any of that crazy crap. But I am healthy and generally coordinated at skiing, dancing etc. Basically just the fun important stuff.

I am not good at traditional “boy sports.” You know, the horrible boring ones like soccer and basketball. Call me sexist. I don’t even care. I generally feel negative about anything that involves throwing, catching or kicking. Hand me a bat and I will swing it at your head. Try to throw something to me and I won’t even try to catch it. I would rather stand there and watch it hit the floor than embarrass myself trying to catch it. Unless it is a baby. I would probably try to catch a baby, but seriously bad move. I can’t catch. Why are you throwing your baby at me?

Yes. This happened. 

This photo likely highlights my one and only interaction with traditional athletic equipment. And look how I’m holding it! Pinky up!? I was clearly too girly for a full grip on that stupid bat. At least I am rocking some awesome pink overalls. I knew what was important even then.

My sister is this way too. Her friends joke about how she is the least competitive person in the entire world. Well, we are both that way. Why? Because we have to be. If we cared about winning, we would be living in constant disappointment. Oh, you want to play cards? You are annoyed that I am not as “into it” as you? Sorry, but I was molded at a young age to not be competitive. Our lack of ability in playground activities taught us to check our competitive nature at the door. This lesson began very early and has seeped into other areas of our lives. Even if it is something that we have the potential to be good at! Like cards, shuffleboard or handstand contests… Actually, we would dominate in a handstand contest. Let’s go. Let’s do this. Psych! We don’t care.

Wanna hear something hilarious? My sister is on a rec softball team. She secretly hates it and is constantly expressing her hope that each game be rained out. Duh. (Sorry Donkeys!  I hope none of you read this)

I am pretty excited about this series! I hope you are too. We'll see how it goes! Eventually I will run out of material right?...

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Jessica Simpson is pregnant again.

What does this mean for her 3 million dollar Weight Watchers deal? Also, seriously Jessica? I think Suri puts it best. We do not need another 17 month long pregnancy from this chick.

I really hope this is a false report. It isn't like US Weekly is the standard in journalism.

I don’t know if the world is ready more pregnant J.Simps pictures. Are they ever going to get married?? Call me old fashioned, but wouldn't you prefer to have your baby daddy be legally bound to you when you gain all that weight? Just a thought.

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Tuesday, November 27, 2012

My Friends

I have a sick obsession with my friends. They are the most fun people ever. Seriously, there is no possible way that your friends are as fun as mine! My friends are hilarious (filthily so), beautiful and genuine.

After spending time with them, my stomach hurt from laughing so much… or maybe it was all the food.

My women at Rontoms. [photocred to Lauren]

And this is just a select few of the college ones! I am a very lucky girl.

I know this was a lame post. Guess what? Don't care! I am still recovering from the amazing long weekend!

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Holiday Advice

I don’t know about you, but I love Thanksgiving and family activities. Maybe it is because I have a super small family and I am not yet married, therefore I am not trying to juggle multiple families.

My obligations are limited. I choose to kick it with my mom all day and cook. I get to pick out our cooking jams aka kitchen dancing music and make pies. No seriously, that is all the responsibility I have.  So… that is pretty awesome. My mom often tries to make me watch football, but I can usually get out of it.

Many people say that the holidays are stressful. I totally get that! If I had kids or more than one family to answer to, they probably would be! As this is not my situation, I would like to dish out some baseless and gratuitous holiday advice. When I say baseless I really mean it, my only commitment on Christmas Day is my commitment to not showering until at least 1pm.

Here it is:
Do what you want.

I know it sounds selfish, but it is to save your sanity! My dad decided many years ago that they were never going to spend a holiday on the freeway. And you know what!? I am incredibly grateful for that decision. They did what was right for them (and us) and invited everyone to them instead of trying to please everyone else. Everyone was included, so it really just became their call at that point. I’m sure there was some initial drama involved, people probably called them selfish or whatever… but in the end it led to happy, low-stress (for the most part) holidays extending throughout my childhood.

So that is my advice. It is my final word. Just do what you want! And when I am married and I am talking about how much I hate the stress of the holidays, please send me this so I can be pissed at how ignorant to family dynamics I was at this point in my charmed, employed, un-married life.

Here’s to your very own Norman Rockwell holiday season.


Gobble gobble. Psych! We are having prime rib. Seriously.

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Tuesday, November 20, 2012

A weekend of learning.

This weekend I went to a Portland Blogger meet-up. It was awesome because not only did I get to see my real life internet friends, I also learned stuff. Do you know what SEO is? I didn't either. But now I do! …kinda. I was a bad student in the back of the class talking to my friends (Linnea, Sam and Abby). I did take some practical notes though! I also got this super cute mug that Jenni made as our favor.


One thing I did learn that I will have trouble using, is the obvious point that your title and tags need to have key words and somewhat relate to what your post is really about. I struggle with that because I would rather have my title be eye-catching and weird rather than relevant. Meh, we’ll see how it goes.

Other things I learned this weekend are:

1. There is an Elephants going in down the street from my house. My heart is rejoicing but my wallet is pissed.


2. This is my favorite note from church this weekend. It was timely and lovely and beautifully put.


I hope your short T-giving weeks are as stellar as mine! Even with all this narst rain. 

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Pretty Little Liars.

This is not about PLL on ABC Family… Even though it happens to be one of my fav shows.

First things first, I want to say thank you for the confirmation after that last post. I got a number of calls and texts from friends confirming how timely that post was to their lives. Which makes me think, are we all liars most of the time?

Reality is that we all deal with anxiety, fear and the unknown. Why aren't we more honest about it? It would be a lot easier to go through things together. Just saying.

You guys, we are all in this together. (Please watch this at least until Chad's toe-touch)


On a completely different note, I am going to an SEO (search engine optimization) workshop with the Portland Bloggers on Saturday! I am really excited about it because I know nothing about SEO. I love getting together with this group. No one is creeped out by you when you already know about their life! Haha. If you are a blogger you should join us! Check out the Website. And while you are at it, you should probably check out my guest post on their blog too. Duh.


Tuesday, November 13, 2012

The F Word.

Fear.

I know I have written about this before, but I think it is the kind of thing that needs to be mentioned regularly.


So many of us live our lives in fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of failure. Fear of commitment. Fear of the unknown. .. Just to name a few. The thing about fear is that it can be completely debilitating. It is an emotion that can completely take away all common sense and reasoning. Ridiculous.

The thing I know I have shared before is that the Bible tells us NOT TO FEAR.

Isaiah 41:10
Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.

Philippians 4: 6-7
6) Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7) And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

When people read and email and status update this verse from Philippians they are focusing on 7. Well… what about 6!? Read it on its own and get back to me.

On that note, let’s throw anxiety in there too. I get anxious about a lot of stuff. For example, these past few days for me have been riddled with anxiety, like having trouble eating and sleeping anxiety. Am I the only one who thinks excitement and anxiety are from the same family? Like fraternal twins maybe?

So many people use these verses as a comfort. “Oh! The lord is with me. Cotton candy in the sky, I feel comforted.” He is with you and if you are like me you can feel that comfort. Like, seriously physically feel it.  But He is also commanding that you not fear or be anxious. And when you do and stop trusting him, you are actively defying his will for your life. You are disobeying The Word when you live your life anxiously in fear.

But doesn't that enlist a little bit of fear and anxiety in you!? Haha. Vicious cycle. “Do not fear.” It isn't a suggestion! This post probably wasn't helpful for anyone… sorry for instilling an anxious fear of fearing.

I don't blame you if you read this and think, "Eff Laura and her F-word, she is a downer." (Pun!)

How thankful are you for grace!? Majorly thankful.

I leave you with this:
Matthew 6:34
So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

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Friday, November 09, 2012

Endless possibilities and Harry Potter.

It is Friday and I am in SUCH a good mood! My coffee tastes extra caffeinated and my weekend plans are taking over my brain. Endless possibilities my friends. Endless. Reality is that I will probably do a bit of cleaning… but why rain on my own parade? I’m sure I will fall in love with a tall, handsome, Jesus loving stranger this weekend! Why the heck not? It could totally happen.

I also thought I would share a gem that was sent to me this morning. Here is a video that was recorded by my friend Hanna at the midnight premier of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (part 1). We were in line (in the rain and cold) saving spots for some tardy friends. *Warning: Hanna F-bomb in vid.*

video

Obviously a killing curse is involved… what else? Truth is, I forgot about this. Thankfully I am now reminded that Lauren and Marina owe me FOREVER.

Happy weekend!

Tuesday, November 06, 2012

What, Me Worry?

This is a line that my dad likes to throw out there. If you ask him why he is saying the same annoying thing over and over, he stares at you and says, “Alfred E. Neuman!” As if I am supposed to know who that is and what it means.

Sorry Dad, but I didn't read Mad Magazine in the 1960s. Anywho, I think good ole Al has it right though. We don’t need to worry about it! Reality is this: All things will work out for good. All challenging things will eventually come to pass.


Right now one of my challenges is not necessarily personal, but instead in response to others reactions to me. Everyone else seems much more concerned about my life, love life, future plans etc. than I am. New internal response: What, Me Worry?

Another thing I think needs a mention today is the election!! Woohoo! Today is Election Day! I know a lot of people get all stressed and wigged out about their candidates today, but to me Election Day is the coolest thing. We have the right to voice our views and participate in democracy. Does it get much cooler?


I am not super political, but I am a human. And one thing that has really irked me this political season has been the way people have treated each other. It is like people think the internet makes them anonymous, or that not physically being next to someone when hurtful words are used makes them less offensive. Well, it doesn't. That person is still going to read those words. As an observer, it is honestly embarrassing. If you are one of the mean aggressive ones, you should really be embarrassed.

Election Day is exciting. We are officially all participating in something together! And no matter how the races (big and small, state or national) turn out, they are a done deal. It is my hope that after the fact we can just drop the angst and come together! no matter if your chosen candidate is elected. We are a lot stronger when we are united!

In conclusion:


I hope you all rocked the vote! Remember when MTV did “vote or die?” That was a little aggressive.

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Thursday, November 01, 2012

We don’t actually know what we look like.

It isn't like we see our faces all day. I know my hands and nails pretty well. I think they are okay. And I like to paint my nails because it makes me feel put together. I have decided that this is because I literally look at my hands on my keyboard ALL DAY. It is other people that have to look at our faces. Your co-workers and friends probably know your face a lot better than you do. I bet you know details about your significant others face that they don't even know.

I have some friends who are absolutely beautiful! And to be honest, they probably don’t realize how babelicious they are. It isn't like they look at themselves all day. They stare at their computers until it feels like their eyeballs are bright red and about to fall out of their heads. When you feel like a zombie, you assume that you look like one as well.

How I (and probably many others) feel after work:
- My skin feels greasy
- My eyes feel dry (I have now rubbed them, therefore mascara flakes now sit on my cheeks)
- My legs feel like they only half work
- I am hungry enough to eat a meal, but know I should only have a snack (it is confusing)
- I know my make-up came off, but I don’t care
- My outfit feels stale
- My hair is now misbehaving (depending on the weather)
- I need to brush my teeth but opt for gum instead

I assume this is how everyone feels after an 8-hour day at their computer. BUT when I meet my friends for Happy Hour they all still look solidly decent after a long day at work. When we feel nasty, we assume that we also look nasty. We do not see ourselves all the time, others do. In conclusion, this is why we do not always feel the confidence that we know is in us.

Have you ever looked at a picture and thought, “wait, is that me?” It is my guess that you have. That is because you don’t spend your entire day looking in a mirror or at pictures of yourself ala Kim Kardashian. Congratulations for not being a narcissist!

We don’t know what we look like because we spend all of our time looking at other stuff. You are probably good looking. Give yourself some credit.

One Direction had it right. You don't know that you're beautiful! It's okay, why would you?


PS. These guys look like little girls. Nice voices though... call me in 10 years.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Tricks and Treats in the Emerald City.

I went north this weekend to celebrate Halloween. Go ahead and start calling me Lucifer for celebrating the devil's holiday. I just really like to dress up! It was a blast to spend good quality time with friends. I’ll add pictures below of our outrageous 80s outfits, but first I thought I would share 3 weekend highlights.

1.) People laughing at our costumes and us staying in character by walking around doing lunges, high-kicks and punches. (I was sore the next day)

2.) Laying in Cameron’s bed while watching Harry Potter and eating tortilla chips.

3.) Brunch with some of my fave ladies X2. (we had brunch twice, there weren’t clones of my friends)


Jazzercise and Flashdance

Others thought we were Olivia Newton John. I'll take it! 


Prom queen 1985! And her Mormon date. 

Just a couple action shots. Did you want to store your lip gloss in my fanny pack? 

I hope you all had fun and safe weekends! My Halloween will continue with a chili/ voting/ candy passing out party at my parents house on Wednesday. Woot!

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Default Settings

I guess the journal app wasn't a waste after all! Okay guys, this is not a usual post for me. I’m going to get all weird and slightly emo on you. And because I am “reading” Gone Girl, I am going to include a quiz at the end. Who are we kidding… I listen to audio books on my commute. It rocks, you should do it.

Here we go:
I am generally not insecure. At this point in my life, the most insecure I get is usually related to vanity and how others perceive me. But In the past it was SO much more. There was a lingering, ‘am I good enough?’ The most insecure time of my life was probably during college. I am going to assume that this is pretty common. You are no longer at home, you are “playing adult,” and you are making grown-up-ish decisions about your life. I guess it makes sense to be insecure as you are literally coming of age.

That being said, I now have a much stronger sense of self and it is quite liberating. I know who I am. I know how cherished I am by God. I feel confirmed, encouraged and loved by most of the people in my life. Honestly, I feel awesome! Maybe too awesome sometimes...

Yet, putting my self in scenarios where I formerly felt insecure causes me to default into an unstable state of mind. My 19 yr old self comes creeping through and it can become debilitating. And I left that girl behind a long time ago! Some of her outfit choices were… let's just say they were questionable.

My question for you is this, why do we let this happen? We can be completely secure adults, who make solid choices and feel stable in who we are. Yet, we get thrown into situations that make us default into who we were a long time ago. Insecurity, or that reaction that makes us feel like we aren't good enough, seeps back to the forefront. We default into someone of the past.

So what is the plan you guys? Do we avoid those situations at all costs? Or do we get strong enough to not default?

QUIZ:
When you are feeling less than awesome, insecure, or not good enough, do you:
A.) Eat your feelings.
B.) Exercise
C.) Pray about it.
D.) Spend time with people who make you feel like a million bucks.
E.) A,C and D
F.) All of the above.

You probably think the answer is F (all of the above). Well, you are wrong. The answer is E. Duh! Exercise is for chumps.

These are just a few of the chicks who make me feel like a million bucks! This was us (and wine) on Monday night.




I bring this up now because I feel like this has happened to me recently and I thought it could be happening for you as well. Is it!? Or am I alone out here in all this crazy?

Monday, October 22, 2012

I’m totally buggin’!

I’m still feeling totally out of material. Because of this, I downloaded a “journal” app for my iPad. You know, to write in daily. I have never been a good diary keeper or journaler. Any honestly, I am glad I don’t have a record of some of the trivial crap I “went through” as a teenager. So embarrassing.

As expected, the journal has one entry… the intro entry. I have had tons of ideas though! I know it! Because I think of things and topics, or see something totally absurd and think to myself, “I should write that down and post about it.” But I am in a meeting, or driving or having an actual human interaction. Not exactly times conducive to busting out an electronic device.

Who do you think I am? Doug Funnie!?

He always journaled. I bet those entries are embarrassing now though. You guys, he liked a girl name Patti Mayonnaise...

All of this pondering and effort to come up with material has made me reflect on the “theme” of my blog. Because really, is it a lifestyle blog? I write about how my mind wanders, I write about pop culture and things I think are funny, silly or “important” to share. THEN when I am lazy, I add posts about my actual life. I add filler posts of weekend activities. Apparently it is the way I give my rambling mind a rest. My thought process is exhausting! It really is. Just read this paragraph 3 times fast and you will understand.

New topic:
The Man Repeller wrote an awesome post about Clueless that I am pissed I didn't think of first.  Because of this, I have been listening to The Cranberries today. My first thought due to the awesomeness of the playlist was, Elton would so approve of this choice. My second thought?... I really hope my future husband likes 90s music.

Currently playing: The Wallflowers

I’m obviously buggin’

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Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Glam Whore or Glam Fairy?

... I’m still not 100% sure. The following went down in our living room on Monday night.

Current channel: Style Network
Current snack: chocolate chips and candy corn in ramekins
Time: approx 8:30pm

Libby: What is the name of this show?
Me: Glam Whores. (said w/ zero emotion)
Libby: THAT’S THE NAME OF A SHOW!!?
Me: I don't know. (still no emotion)
Libby: It's called Glam Fairy. Although Glam Whores does look like it would fit perfectly!
Both: Bahahahahaha!
[cont. uncontrollable laughter]
Lib: These girls are ridic.
[silent pause]
Lib: "Just because she does a good job doesn't mean she is a fairy."
Me: "Jessica, can you stop drinking the haterade already!?"
[silent pause]
Me: I can't keep watching this.

Channel changed to: ABC Family 
Current programming: Switched at Birth. Victory. 

If this post makes you think I don’t like horrible reality TV you are severely mistaken. Trash television is an unfortunate, yet amazing, common occurrence in our home. I just couldn't handle Glam Fairy. Watch the clip below and you will understand.


I hope you noted how A2 spelled "faires fly hi."

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Black Butte and Katy Perry

Black Butte was super relaxing. Fall foliage, vino and the Katy Perry movie… yep, that describes my weekend pretty well! No other words needed.

There was a Harvest Fair happening in Sisters. So that was awesome! 

We took long walks in the cool autumn air.

Pretty fall foliage!! 

Did you guys see the Katy Perry movie? If so, did it make you guys like Katy Perry? I have always found her so annoying due to her songs and outfits. But now I like her! Not necessarily musically, although some songs are catchy, I just like HER. The breakdown due to the demise of her marriage made her human and now I am rooting for her. Why she is dating John Mayer is beyond me. She is better than that!


I hope your weekends were relaxing too!

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Thursday, October 11, 2012

Fog and writers block.

I am currently suffering from writers block. I usually have drafts in my email of random thoughts and ideas. Or I find notes in my phone that easily prompt me to write a post. These past weeks have been a struggle though. Once I get going the text usually flows, as I’m sure it will for this one… about writers block. In many cases it is hard to shut me up. Even when it is about absolutely nothing! I’m sure my real life friends are nodding their heads right now. I have a special talent for talking about things I know nothing about with extreme, yet baseless, passion.

It is foggy and I am lethargic. I am also thinking about buying one of those happy lights from Costco. I don’t have winter depression, but I also don’t think it hurts to make a preemptive strike.

I love fall so much! But the knowledge of the impending season of darkness is daunting. I just need to push it out and enjoy this time. The trees have begun to change! I am so excited to crunch through them in my boots! You know, on my walk from Nordstrom to Pioneer Place.

Walking on this will be boss. 

I am off to Black Butte this weekend! So I’ll be sure to spend some time looking out the window while coming up with some post ideas that you will all like!

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Tuesday, October 09, 2012

When you look bad enough at the mall…

…the kiosk people don’t hound you to straighten your hair.

I found an old note in my iPhone that said just that. Obviously my experience affected me enough to literally “note it.”

Background to the scenario:
Quite a while ago I went to Washington Square Mall looking like total garbage. That day consisted of a Saturday morning workout, no make-up was involved and we were in a season where any traces of a tan were completely gone. Basically, I looked rather scary. In turn, I was not approached by a single kiosk person. Not even the creepy hand lotion one or Proactiv.

On another note, have you been to the mall lately? Is it just me, or has the idea of the mall drastically lost its luster? Remember the middle school days of loitering in Claire’s or Sam Goody? So awesome.

Yes, the mall is incredibly productive because multiple stores you need to go to are all in the same place. But lately it just sucks! I hate how I feel after I go to the mall. If I am going to spend an obscene amount of money on clothes and cosmetics, I would much prefer to do my shopping in surroundings that I enjoy. The harsh fluorescents of an indoor mall are not my jam.

Don’t get me wrong! I shop at the mall. Usually Pioneer Place though, that way I am able to enjoy the city... as I am forced to walk 2 blocks up to Nordstrom. You know I am always tryna hit up Nords, Gap and H&M in the same shopping trip.


Am I the only one who is over the mall? I can’t help but think of how disappointed Cher Horowitz would be of me.

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Friday, October 05, 2012

Today is Friday!

In celebration of the impending weekend, I would like you to remember that anything is possible!
[Start watching at 0:13]


How much do you love Tom Haverford? It should be a lot.

Wednesday, October 03, 2012

Insta-ridiculous and apple picking.

This weekend I went apple picking with some fantastic old and new friends. We went to a place called Bell Farms out past Beaverton down Farmington road. The picking was obv awesome, but the best part came later. They let us use their cider press and It was so freak-yeah fun!

Here are the photos of the day, but that is not what this post is about. Keep reading!

How can you not do cartwheels in an orchard?



Cutting up the apples and pears for the cider!

Step 1: grind       Step 2: press cider

Blurry but awesome. Such an American day! 

When the day was done and Nicole and I were sitting on my couch this conversation ensued:

Me: Hmm. Which filter shall I use? Whoa, Nashville looks good! Nashville never looks good! I’m doin’ it.
Nicole: Nice!
Nicole: No seriously though, which of these looks better? I like Brannan. It makes the apples look better, but Valencia makes you look tan.
Me: Who do you care about more? Me? Or some stupid cut up apples!? Rude. Make me tan.

Victory. We could have been talking about serious things like life, but instead we talked about instagram like these were the most serious decisions we had ever made. Ridiculous.




It's an election year. You should all do something American like apple picking!

Saturday, September 29, 2012

It's a Blog Eat Blog World.

Or at least that is what they want you to think!

Thankfully there is a community of fellow blog writing, inter-web obsessed lunatics. I of course mean this in a loving way, as I am included in this category. It is a blast to be a part of a group of PDX bloggers. If you are interested in new friends (cyber and real) check out the site and join the blog list!

Anywho, I did a guest post over on the Portland Bloggers Blog! Check it out Here.


Have a great weekend everyone!

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Open letter to Christina Aguilera.

Dear Christina,

You have an amazing voice. That is my first statement because your talent is outstanding and I want you to remember it as this letter continues.

Christina, I reflect on the days of "Genie in a Bottle" with fond memories. Time spent making up dances in the cul-de-sac on a hot summer day. Jumping on the trampoline and singing "Come on Over" at the top of my lungs. It was glorious.

Then you decided to be a Latin singer… before blossoming into X-Tina. At this time you also decided that clothes were optional, piercings were key to your look and thought spray tans were probably a good idea. Your songs on Stripped were dynamite, but something happened… were you confused? Trying to find "the real xtina”? I was confused too. But I did have a blast at the Stripped/Justified concert. I do wish you and Justin sang at least one song together though. I know it is weird, but that album reminds me of Christmas. My sister and I listened to that CD non-stop all winter, probably because every song was amazing. Personal fave: "Get mine, Get Yours."


After that, you somehow became linked to Target in my mind. Why is that? Back to Basics, Burlesque, that weird robot album… What!? You have the pipes! SING! That is all we want. I am a fan of you and your voice. I am going to speak for your fan base and tell you that good songs are the only thing we are looking for from you. We don’t need a new persona every few years. Just good pop music that is easy to belt to in the car.

I like you on The Voice. You are a sassy beez. You have a good dynamic with the other judges and it is fun to see you in a normal-ish environment. Although, your boobs are always out. You should tuck those girls in at least once a week... I promise they won't suffocate. Time for a new stylist maybe? I am excited for your new album! I have high hopes for what it may contain.

Remember Mickey Mouse Club? Me too.

Love,
Laura

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